The first word that comes to mind describing 2024 is disappointment.
I experienced some major upsets in all areas of my life, including family, friends, work, and even finances.
At one point, I felt like my entire world was falling apart.
Throughout the year, situations unfolded, leading some to believe I was overly sensitive and taking things too personally. A few words to describe me in 2024 were: selfish, childish, immature, ridiculous, and petty.
I am loyal to a fault. I will stand beside even when everyone else walks away. You can hurt me and I will stay by your side. I’m skilled at building strong relationships. I perceive things others miss. I overlook your flaws, focusing instead on your strengths. I do not judge on mistakes. But continually making bad choices, yes, I judge.
I rarely put myself first. I take care of others first. I think of others’ feelings first. I make sure others feel safe, loved and thought about. I will give to others even when I have nothing left. When others do not reciprocate my actions, I feel disappointed, deserted, and unwanted.
I can read rooms and people fairly well. I study their body language when talking. I watch how they move and navigate situations. I hear what people do not say, reading between the lines. I can all bull shit from a mile away. It has become clear to me over time that it is a skill. A skill I need to nourish not run away from. Relying on my body’s intuition is important when things seem unclear.
2024 had many mess ups. In order to keep the peace, I ignored the signs. I continually made excuses for others’ poor behavior. I kept trying to see the good people when there was nothing to see. I gave the benefit of the doubt more times than I care to admit. To the point it was detrimental to my own mental health.
The word Discover kept appearing when I reached my limit. The word was everywhere. I am tired. I cave in and slow down, listen, and see what was coming to me.
I am also fully aware, when I am ready to learn a lesson, he provides the way.
Here is where I highlight the things I discovered this year. I am sharing the in hopes they give you the permission you need to move forward.
God gave you your unique skills to use. Use them. It’s not your problem. Don’t try to fix it. Stick to your boundaries and trust your instincts.
You can’t build trust with people who manipulate the truth to avoid accountability. Trust takes time to build. However, it can vanish instantly.
When you voice your concerns and others ignore them, that’s their responsibility, not yours. Never stop speaking your truth.
Elevating individuals is detrimental. They are human. They will make mistakes. Don’t give them your power.
It is not your job to fix things. Life is complicated and relationships are hard. You can only do so much. At some point, other people have to accept responsibility for their actions.
Relationships are a two-way street. You needn’t exert extra effort. If they want you in their life, they will make sure you are included.
Walking away is accepting that you are the bigger person.
You do not need to include everyone. It is your life; you get to decide. If someone is not available during the hard times, they certainly don’t deserve a privileged position during good times.
You are human, you can not and will not make everyone happy. Stop trying. Protect your peace and happiness.
I realize that one person repeatedly directed those words at me. Pain drove them; they wished similar pain to others. Those words to not describe me as a person. #discover
I was wrong: 2024 proved surprisingly good. Instead, it was the year of discovery. Discovering that my feelings, peace, happiness and worth are just as important as everyone else’s. I need to stop idealizing others and expecting reciprocal care. After all, we are just humans.
Peace out 2024. I anticipate 2025 with excitement.
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