Have The Hard Conversations

In this day and time, we are all some hustle and bustle. But are we making time to have the hard conversations? Or do you just shove those conversations to the side, because there is always something more important to do? 

I know I typically shove those conversations to the back burner. Sometimes it because I don’t know how to approach the topic. Sometimes I don’t feel like we have adequate time to talk. Why start the conversation if we can’t finish it, right?   Sometimes I am just plain being a chicken. 

Well, this afternoon on the way home from piano practice, my oldest daughter and I had a true heart to heart. The funny thing about the conversation is it didn’t take long at all. Before we knew it, the talk was over and we were both laughing our tails off. 

During this conversation, we realized if we had just taken the time to talk to each other, we could have saved each other a lot of misery. Lots of assumptions were made during this time. And we all know about assuming things.

Instead, of having the hard talk we both suffered for years, trying to make each other happy. Thinking we knew what the other wanted or needed, based on previous experiences. Boy, we were both wrong.  

I asked Delilah if I could share our story and of course, she said yes. 

We ran into the store to buy some ice cream for a special treat tonight. The store had a limited selection of ice cream. Well, limited based on the brand that was on sale. (who pays full price for ice cream?) The normal flavors that we buy were out of stock, so I grab one that looked interesting. She walked up and approved my selection, after reading the back label. Now fast forward to the car ride. I commented that I could not wait to try the Cookie Cake Ice Cream, while you finish off the other ice cream. Then in pure teenage fashion, she shoots me a puzzled look with a high pitch voice, wondering why she has to eat the other ice cream. My sweet calm reply, was because the Cookie 2 Step Ice Cream is your favorite and the only reason we buy. She then proceeds to tell me that Cookie 2 Step is MY favorite ice cream and that is why we buy it. 

Blue Bell Ice Cream Containers

So now we arguing about whose favorite ice cream Cookie 2 Steps is. She likes the bits of cookie dough and I like the cookie n cream part. She hates the cookie n cream part and I hate the cookie dough parts. Mind you by now we are both laughing hysterically because neither of us really cares for the ice cream that we have been buying for years, all because we both thought the other liked it. 

All of this confusion could have been prevented if we both had made the time to talk to each other instead of assuming we knew what the other wanted. Years have been spent eating bad ice cream flavors to make the other person happy. Don’t make the same mistake, make time for hard conversations. 

Blue Bell Cookie 2 Step Flavor

On a side note, while writing this, we discovered that Cookie 2 Step is actually one of Dante’s favorites. #middlekidsyndrome Sorry dude. 

In a nutshell, I am only slightly joking when I say which Ice Cream Flavor one likes deems a "hard conversations". In this family, we approach most everything with humor. so as Delilah and I talked about the miscommunication with the ice cream, it dawned on me how easily we avoid conversations. Often times, because we think we know what the other person wants, likes, or needs. And this simple story of the mistaken ice cream proves that sometimes we just need to talk to each other.
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