Do I need to grieve?

Grief has gotten a bad name. We often only associate the grief emotion when someone has passed away. However we technically grieve many different things. We just don't call it grieving, or we just ignore it all together. 

There are over 43 different types of grief aka loss, that we should be dealing with.

Loss of friendships, relationships, job loss, money, identity, etc.. are just a few things that we can grieve.

Grief is normal and is a natural reaction to any kind of loss. Any kind…

It never occurred to me to look at grief as a loss. 

It was shortly after leaving my corporate job that I began to learn about grieving. 

I thought that when I left my job I would be on cloud nine and feel free. Living life to the fullest and having fun all the time. What I experienced instead was a heavy burden on my chest. 

I started trying to figure out what emotion I was feeling and that is when I learned that I was grieving the loss of my job. Even though I left my job on my terms, it is still considered a loss. 

I spent 22 years with the same company. My identity was tied to my job, and how well I did there. When I left I lost part of who I was. 

I had to take time to process that loss and heal the emptiness I was feeling. It was so hard to move forward while carrying around the heartache of that loss. 

I was being stubborn and carried it around for months. For me personally I not only had to process the loss of my job, but I also needed to detox my body from stress that had piled up all those years. 

What I learned is we all deal with and process feelings differently. Now that you can view grief as a form of loss instead of just death, think back on your life. 

Take a moment and see if you missed an opportunity to properly grieve. A hint that you may need to grieve an event in your life is

  • You have a hard time talking about that situation. Maybe you get really agitated or defensive when the topic comes up. 

  • You have issues/comments that you never were able to speak of. Did someone say something that hurt your feelings and you never responded? Was there a situation in your life where you didn’t stand up for yourself? 

  • You have unrealized hopes, dreams, for a relationship. You planned a wedding with your ex. You had dreams of traveling with your bestie. 

Grief is emotional, therefore thoughtful comments are not helpful. Allow yourself the Grace and compassion  you deserve to heal from past losses in your life. The time has come for you to lay down your burdens, lighten your load, and move on. 

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